Here is a short tease from the edgy YA. Jefferson has convinced Laura to let him drive her home after she avoided him all day long.
“Hey Laura. You can sit up, you know.”
“No, someone might see me.” She ducks lower in the seat.
She is the most paranoid person I believe I have ever met.
“And does that matter?” I ask as I get into the car.
“Yes, Jefferson. It matters. You don’t want your friends to see us together.”
Okay, now I’m getting pissed. What does she know about my friends?
“Laura, this is crazy. I don’t care if my friends see us together. I don’t hide things.”
“Really? So they know about your dad? They see your bruises?”
Aww, poor Jefferson. I lol'd at "she is the most paranoid person." I love that kind of inner dialogue. :)
ReplyDeleteThis is quite a tense scene but its still! Quite funny!
ReplyDeleteooh, cliffhangery :)
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed it, I like the voice!
Nice voice! I agree with Kaitlin--this is a little cliffhanger!! :D
ReplyDeleteoh very interesting!
ReplyDeleteOkay, ding, ding, ding! We have a winner! I think you gotta pursue this one! I like the voice...you know me and my male narrators, lol.
ReplyDeleteKeep at this one, girlfriend!!! I believe this one's the ticket!
I agree with the inner dialog comment above. This really helps me get into the character's head. Oh, and I love the name of the girl. Just sayin'. ;)
ReplyDeleteI like the MC's voice :)
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed this! Great voice!
ReplyDelete